God works in such mysterious ways. Just as I was thinking about talking with God about where He desires me to minister and "are you sure you want me to still focus on widowhood?" a friend of mine posted a heartbreaking fundraising page on Facebook. It was the tragic story of a young newly married man who was beginning hospice due to cancer. It was the beautiful, awe-inspiring story of what God was doing in the life of one young couple who clung to Him and His faithfulness through the most terrifying storm. Elliott Orr was that man. Christina, his young widow, has graciously written their story and provided great pictures so we could get to know Elliott.
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Hello all!! This is Christina Orr, and this is my
husband Elliott's story.
It is hard for me to describe all of what Elliott is
and was, but for those of you who did not personally know him, I will try to
give you a glimpse of his character. To me, he is and was my best friend. He
was caring, compassionate, and loving, and I could tell him anything. He would
listen, no matter how much I talked, and he always had very wise counsel. In
our relationship, he was the romantic. He would write me letters and poems and
would always surprise me with gifts. Elliott was a terrific boyfriend and a
even more wonderful husband. To the world, Elliott was very smart. He went to
the Scripps National Spelling Bee three times! He loved learning and remembered
everything he was ever taught. Elliott was so driven in all that he did. He was
valedictorian, he was an all state athlete, and he was just good at everything.
It was annoying at times, but you couldn't stay mad at him for long because he
was so goofy. He would try to make me laugh every time the opportunity
presented itself. I can't tell you how many times he put on a dress, skirt, or
tutu to make me smile.
His best quality was that he loved the Lord and knew
that his mission in life, even though brief, was to glorify Him.
Elliott and I had known each other our whole lives.
We grew up in a small town, we went to the same church, and my dad coached him
in soccer for years. I never really liked him much though. I saw him as a
"know-it-all" who answered every question in Sunday school correctly.
Behind his back, I would refer to him as "smelly-it". As time went on
though, his intellect became more endearing to me and the nerdy boy I once knew
started to look like a cutie. When his braces came off before he went into high
school, I knew my 14 year old heart was in love. He had no idea that I liked him, and he
thought that I was just a nice girl who coincidentally was where ever he
was. He later called me a stalker, but I
would disagree. I was just a girl who knew that she was in love with this cute,
kind of nerdy, and funny boy.
But of course it was high school, and you just can't
tell a boy that you like him. You have to get your friends to do it for you. Eventually,
my friends told Elliott that I liked him. Elliott couldn't just go off raw
emotion to know if he liked me, he had to logically deduce that I could be a
girl for him and his logic ended up in my favor. We started dating October 9,
2006. He was a freshman in high school, and I was sophomore. Usually people
don't expect your high school sweetheart to be the one, but we made it all
through school together. I had so much fun dragging him to dances, going to
bonfires, and watching movies with him. I was a year older than him in school,
so I attended Michigan State University while he was a senior.
Once he graduated, he followed me to Michigan State.
While in school, we both got hooked up with an on campus ministry and church,
and we loved growing and maturing in the Lord together. The summer after
Elliott's freshman year, we made plans to go on a college missions trip.
Because we were going down to South Carolina for the summer, Elliott went to
the doctor for a routine check-up. He
mentioned to his doctor that his right shoulder had been bothering him, and
just to be safe, the physician made El get his arm x-rayed. What they found
changed the course of both of our lives forever. They found a tumor in his
right humerus (the long arm bone that goes from shoulder to elbow).
On that day, May 16, 2011, Elliott was diagnosed
with Osteosarcoma, a juvenile bone cancer. We were totally shocked. In less
than two weeks, he started a harsh chemotherapy regiment meant to kill any
rapidly dividing cell in Elliott's body. This included cancer cells but also
white blood cells and hair. It also left him with awful mouth sores where he couldn't
swallow, eat, or talk without severe pain. During the duration of his chemotherapy
he lost more than 40 pound. On August 16, 2011, in a 12 hour surgery, Elliott
had his right humerus removed and replaced by a cadaver bone, and he also had
half of a right rib removed. After his surgery, he continued with his awful chemotherapy treatment.
He powered through, with determination and hope that
this cancer would be a struggle that he could overcome. He got done with chemo
on January 11, 2012 and moved into his dorm room at Michigan State that same
night. He came back to college with more purpose and drive because he now knew
what occupation he planned to pursue. He wanted to become an oncologist.
For a year and a half, Elliott was in remission. El built
up his strength and could walk to class without being short of breath. His
mouth sores went away, and he could finally eat solid food. He started playing
soccer again, which he loved. We finally got to go on that college missions trip
and learned a lot about the Lord and his love for us. In December 2012, Elliott
asked me to marry him, and we were planning a wedding for August 31, 2013.
Elliott continued to work hard in school with hopes of getting into medical
school. Life kept moving and cancer seemed like a distant scary memory.
When Elliott had unexplained hip pain, we thought he
had pulled a muscle running or playing soccer. Elliott had a bone scan because
of this pain, and they found multiple tumors in his pelvis, hips, lungs, and
both bilateral heads (the part of the leg bone that fits into the pelvis). On July 10, 2013, Elliott was told that his cancer was
back, and that his cancer could not be cured and could only be kept at bay. Our
oncologist told us that Osteosarcoma would most likely take Elliott's life. Elliott's
family and I were devastated, but Elliott seemed more calm and cool than I have
ever seen him. Everyone cried, and Elliott just held our hands. He said,
"Through any circumstances, all I have ever wanted to do was to bring
glory to God through Christ."
After a few days of non-stop crying, we talked about
getting married sooner than we had planned. We settled on July 18, 2013, my
22nd birthday. We moved back to our home town, Elliott withdrew from Michigan
State, work got started on a little house across from Elliott's parents, and we
planned a wedding in a week. I felt like I did everything in slow motion, so
many people took the reins on planning. I am so grateful that they did. After giving people less than a week's notice,
we said "I do" in front of 400 people on a Thursday at 1 pm. It was
absolutely amazing. We didn't worry about the flowers and the cake like most couples
at weddings, we were just happy to get the opportunity to be married and to
love each other in sickness and in health.
Less than a week after our wedding, we started the
long road of treatment that would never end. A blessing of this second
treatment was that the side effects did not include mouth sores. Most days, when we weren't in the hospital,
life felt pretty normal. Elliott and I traveled to East Lansing to see our
friends who were still students at Michigan State. We could go to church
together, and we spent a lot of time lounging in our new house with our dog,
Nema. Elliott continued this treatment for seven months. We took a break after
this treatment and took a honeymoon to Disney World.
But, the cancer spread again getting larger and
larger everywhere in his body. We started trying other treatments. We tried
another chemotherapy treatment, then an experimental immunotherapy at the
National Institute of Health, and then radiation. Nothing seemed to control the
cancer. In January 2015, the tumors had spread to his spine, and he had become
paralyzed and could not move from the waist down. He told me that this was by
far the worst experience of his whole life because he had become totally
dependent on others to help him. On February 2, Elliott woke up and was not
able to catch his breath, and we found out that he had a blood clot in his
lung. After struggling to get enough oxygen to his body for days, he went to be
with the Lord February 6, 2015 at 23 years old surrounded by his family who loved him.
But Elliott didn't live his life for temporary,
earthly things; he lived for eternal ones. He showed so many people that even
though his body was wasting away, he still had a hope in a God that saved him
from his sins through Jesus. His high spirits and naturally happy demeanor was
not because he knew this cancer was beatable, but because he knew that his real
battle against sin and death had already been won by Christ. He wrote this poem
in 2011.
"People
say with albeit good intentions
That if God heals me then His glory will be shown,
But people often hesitate to mention
The other side of His omniscient throne.
"For God
to show His power through healing
Would be glorious if it were His will,
But it would also be maybe too appealing
For perhaps my faith would stand too still.
"For
in truth I want all to realize in whole
That I care not what this ailment does
Because I truly believe in full
That God knew it all before it was.
"And
in trusting Him I would gladly endure
One thousand years of agony and strife
In order to witness the most glorious cure
Of Christ coming into just one more person’s life." - Elliott Orr
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I am in awe of the godliness and maturity this young husband and wife showed in the face of death. They lived out their faith.
If their story has touched your heart, please consider how you can honor Elliott's memory and Christina's journey.
1.
Run/Walk/Cheer: Runner or not a runner, please come out to the race! You can run, walk, or cheer. I believe Christina will even be able to join us!!!
2.
Donate: Elliott does have a mission and scholarship fund
that will be used to help further the Gospel in places where it is not known,
and it is also used to further the education of a high school valedictorian and
a boys soccer player at North Branch High School. If you would like to donate
here is the steps to do so:
1. Log in into your Paypal account or Sign up
for a Paypal account.
2. On the main page in the upper right hand
corner, click on the icon "Pay or Send Money."
3. Click on "Send Money to family or
friends."
4. The email address for the donations is
eorrmissionfund@gmail.com.
3. Spread the Word: Have you told your friends and family about this amazing man? Please share his story of faith, encouragement, and courage.
4. Pray:
* Praise God that our Heavenly Father, in His perfect timing and knowledge, has completely healed Elliott and freed him from cancer and sin!
* Pray for Elliott's family and friends, especially Christina as she grieves the absence of her best friend and husband. This time in the grieving process is especially hard as the numbness wears off and the reality sets in.
* Praise for their faithful witness to God's sustaining comfort and love.
* Pray for the end of cancer. It sucks.
* Praise God for the gift of memory and pictures.
* Pray for all those involved in the race
